North South Collide – Episode 13


Lucky episode 13 is here.

“…that is the end of the North South Collide” – a salty exchange about ‘mine sweeping’ nearly leads to the end of the podcast series when Josh threatens to walk out.

In further developments, Josh’s book now has a release date: 1st October 2014. That’s right, the fruits of a whole year’s labour will be available for you to dissect and disseminate in literary form from next week.

Get ready.



While reading my sister’s diary I found this:

column, new music, text

Umberé keeps turning up unannounced. I think he’s been tinkering with the drink again. I tried to tell mum, in as organised a fashion as possible, but the woman just will not have it!

OK, so at times I can be a little unconventional with my directives but come on! Just reply to me and say;

‘Leave me alone Ella’ rather than hiding your head in the cupboard and whistling ‘bobby’s girl’ over and over.

Oh yeah, she really loves that dang song. Someone should tell her Bobby ain’t coming.

anyway… that’s just me paraphrasing. Here’s an old song:


Young Thug Is Cambridge Educated

text, video

It might be strange for some of our older readers to discover that Young Thug is actually a far throw from the streets of Atlanta, he bangs for, but new evidence uncovered this week suggests this to be the case.


‘Thugger thugger’ as the chap is affectionately known, is actually Cambridge educated and really ‘bout dat bang bang Samuel Taylor Gang Coleridge lyf.


This week, his ex-room mate has come forward to support the claims that the man is actually a bona fide intellectual.


Basil Gordon-Humphries claims thugger wrote the following verse while living in halls in Pembroke college:


My diiiiamonds, they say Pikachu / They gon’ wink at you / I’m a boss, bitch, I’ma walk through and just peek at you.”


Apparently it was created as an ode to the influence of Japanese anime on contemporary western civilisation.


Gordon-Humphries reminisces about the ‘livestyle’ rapper once jokingly ruffling up Gordon-Humphries’ hair when coming home one night to find that Gordon-Humphries had spilt some malted milk on the rapper’s Sex and the City collection.


Apparently the pair had forgotten about the disagreement by the next morning.


Young Thug might have a privileged background but the man’s still saying fuck the other side.



North South Collide – Episode 11


Episode 11 is here.

“you didn’t leave on your own accord did you?” – Josh on Dylan’s exit from work.

“my dad’s the sort of man who likes to leave the shower with his skin red” – Dylan on his old man.

“the first thing i saw when i opened the door was a naked gentleman in the shower’ – Josh on Dylan’s new living situation

…too many soundbites to quote in this episode. One of the best so far. Enjoy. x



North South Collide – Episode 10


North South Collide – It’s back with a brand new episode for your predilection. The boys discuss the new college football season, pontificate on the wonders of technology and how it’s shaping our future, as well as unveiling new running back Randy Geldof to the world!

“That’s not nice, that’s Jimmy Savile” – Josh on Dylan’s approach to speaking to young children at Engagement parties.



” /]

tyler the creator dylan yates – The Tape Intro Remix

new music

tyler is one of my favourite rappers. this is one of his best songs.



tyler the creator

Nigga seventeen his own fucking magazine
And of course his Hunger Force is aqua teen by all means
Fuck a deal, signature is legible
I’m the reason why niggas is heatin’ up they vegetables
From being bullied in the sixth, to being dissed by any bitch
That can breath, please throw me in a ditch
And I hope I sell a copy of this disk
Fuck Hope, I am one short, a miracle of wish
Whether you nigga or ese, the magazine is great
Because the articles an essay
Half you dumb niggas can’t even write an essay
Cause all of ya’ll some stupid asses, S.A
You motherfuckers in denial
I’m the square just like the tile, right down the fucking isle
Music was my only friend, ever since I was a child
I make niggas frown, just to give myself a smile
Mother was my father, the nigga didn’t bother
To send a kid a dollar, my only role model was
Niggas that record and that could play keyboards
And wild piano chords make me happy
Dr. Suess more important than Jesus
Y’all immigrants to depression, Nigga give me a visa
We sick, the same lames that sneeze us
Made us turn to Jazz now, because the black kids would tease us
I need a fucking chain, I need to make it rain
I need some fucking rims, A car that I can rent
A verse about swag, jeans sagging off my ass
No I don’t, fuck that, I am not a fucking fag
I run and I’m still scared of guns
In the marching band but I bang my own drums and
Sing my own song, all of my wrongs are right
Never got into a fight, hit me
Bass, drum, snare let it go
Disappear like good music in the past year
And everybody do the same thing, I hear the same shit
All the time, like the radio is queer
This isn’t a mixtape, it’s more of ear rape
By kids who think you other niggas suck
It’s very offensive, you niggas defensive
If you can’t take the heat then get the fuck out the kitchen, listen

dylan yates

Im me and they
Are them whoever they are plus
Moving over raps
Let the bars up. Im nervous

thru ur garden
Sneak can my hands cope
Dypublishing is my company
Is it planned? Nope

know that im right
So i stay im
passioned by the gates where i meet u why wont u say things

From work pick
you up then we touch each
Into my bed where i keep u
I want the rush deep

I travel trains then i stay in there cigarette coffee and
Dialogue over greyer hair

needing quarters to travel
In my battle unravel
hope that I’m thought of by u
Hope that i matter

I travel east on the Hammersmith
Paddington bound
To reading meet
What is happening now

starting out scared
Cuz im asking you loud
Do u wanna be my boyfriend
The reply’s no

Im drinking vodka my the litre tryna angle my speaker making the music thump my chest hard, for señorita

Repeating errors of the past hard
Shatter the glass bar
Making eyes blurry and wander towards the kasbah

My dilemma: to be good and not tremor
Or do the things my daddy said dont is the problema

Get inspiration in waves
Im feeling constantly brave
4 u to knock it all back
With just a hand wave

I hit the microphone
Demand rage
Leaked thru the millimetre mixture adrenaline shooting up in my hand raised

When will i learn?
what did i tell u
to making errors im committed
Cuz im searching for virtue. My ange

I call u sweetly your alive sleep
I wanna stare at ur body till we arrive deep. I love

So in the passion hope im guided well
I wanna use my power make you sigh at will. Is fire

u think its funny and il laugh
is in my trash settings,
im getting out of here
in the last betting

different women hug
They spend what im giving up
Move away
to ldn partying probably thinking of

You. Why
my name is DY cuz
my poems are posters
Explaining whatever might bust

dont give a monkeys
Stick to u like dust
Hit u with
the 16 barros remaining liked just

I swear this
Life is a right bust
Cuz women who stare at me
Often r in disguises

Without vetting me
The new house are letting me
Move in here
Hope these ppl wont be regretting me now

External activities
Creep round
like im johny gutter
But im johnny blaze sound

Doggies mutter
keep on its lead fell
Each spell
That i created is in complete hell